It was told to me two years ago by an old owner of The Coffee House, “Boundaries.” How do we know if we overstepped boundaries or not do we formally agree? Or are we facing Co-Dependency on every level. Is it my job to do everything for someone with nothing in return. Is there a formal agreement?
Now I’m going to discuss my love life or mistakes in it, but was it actually my fault or was I led on. What are the boundaries set between a Counselor and Client setting, A Celebrity and a Fan, A barista, bartender, or waitress and a customer? It is known that they all get hit on, but even by me. However, boundaries have to be set by both parties and not just assuming the one hitting on them is bad.
I have been in a clinical setting for 13 years and have even been a patient and I had to respect boundaries even if sometimes in a hospital setting as a client I over stepped them.
However, what I will say should change how we view things. I should be a verbal agreement between both parties and roles on the exception of a clinical setting where they have their own rules. But I took a leave because those boundaries were crossed by what was done. As a counselor I did my job. Maybe not best but I kept boundaries. Some may not think so, but I tried my best to be professional even though in the beginning I made mistakes.
Which brings me to boundaries. Boundaries are when one person sets an agreement with one party and the other party accepts. They are not supposed to be forced to do something against their will even if you are the boss. Just from mistakes set by our former leaders we have problems with boundaries as we do. The reason why I defend Monica Lewinsky is because Bill Clinton was the boss and he broke the law as a boss and he had Monica Lewinsky to suffer the fate for his action. Was Monica right well maybe not, but they did get close and she was turned on just so Bill could spare his image. Had Bill openly and honestly told the truth saying he was open and honest about the relationship that it was both their agreement then things would be accepted. The fact is their has to be boundaries set even if you might not like the outcome, but if you verbally agree on that contract between both parties it is accepted. And in the Contract in Marriage it says for better or for worse. So Hillary should forgive Monica and not make her pay. I know it was awhile but what happened then is relevant to me today.
When I went after the First Barista and the Woman Bartender there was no verbal agreement saying that they were interested or not. They were in a position where they have to hold a reputation to the public. And they have to set boundaries. If they here that I am interested or someone is interested they must have said something of a statement such as I am a Barista. I am bartender. I am a Waitress and I am not interested in you do to my position. Or I see what you are doing I’m with someone or I am interested we will see what is going on.
An agreement is set between both parties, Unless it is company policy and that has to be negotiate between both parties if they are truly in love. Contracts always can be negotiated or renegotiated should they be. Where does it say in the contract of marriage that they are the only one. A marriage is a binding contract like any other contract. Even if we don’t agree by what is in it. Just as anything can be renegotiated. If we truly love someone we should be able to love freely without fear of breaking that contract. Which means if someone doesn’t agree to that contract and they are forced to do something they don’t want to do they are liable for a lawsuit and they will be protected in the court of law.
Which means I am not to blame for what happened I was led on by women making me believe a false hope. And people should forgive me for being rageful because my boundaries were over stepped even if I may have overstepped boundaries myself. And Vince I don’t want you to hang it up I’d rather you work on but want you doing commentary with Jesse I miss the olden days.